Ok this is really hard...

So once again I've been looking to food to fix, well, everything. Boredom, aggravation..... everything.

I started the 'diet' thing again yesterday. My fat clothes are starting to get hard to fit into again. That's sad. My sister used to call me "Skinny Minnie" but now my friends call me "Squishy." Seriously, I'm not kidding. Scott was trying to be sweet. I made a comment about my fat rolls a couple weeks ago and he said:

"You're not fat, you're..... you're squishy."

It stuck. Damnit. He was honestly trying to be nice (I think) but he fucked it all up. Boys tend to do that. So anyway I'm 'dieting'. For me that means eating normally. Only when I'm actually hungry and not eating cake or danishes just because they're on the kitchen counter when I walk by. You wouldn't think it would be that hard but when you've gotten into the habit of eating constantly... quite literally constantly, it's not so easy to do.

I'm cranky... very cranky...